Tuesday, September 05, 2006

Forging Blithely On

I could just chalk up my prolonged absence from blogging to my summer travels. And, as summer travel goes, this was a magnificent year.

But there is another reason for the lack of posts over the past few months.

My blog is no longer anonymous.

And, not without consequence. Recently, forty two pages of my posts appeared in court papers, along with some carefully edited excerpts, in a case which has momentous importance to me.

On the whole, I’m pleased to say that I am proud of what I have written (though not every word is golden, of course), even when read with the microscopic scrutiny which these circumstances impose.

And, certainly, my identity was never a matter of deep cover. My family and friends (or ex-friends, as the case may be) know my story well, and I've provided ample clues as I've scribbled away here. I suppose that I knew that it was just a matter of time before someone would connect the dots.

But now, you see, the stakes are a bit higher. Each word that I post can, and probably will, be used against me in court. And these stakes are high. They relate to what is most near and dear to me in life.

As those who have read my blog will know, my objective is certainly not to offend people. If I do have any specific agenda at all, it is to shed light on the process of believing and not believing, and to explore the gulf in understanding between those who live with faith and those who do not.

Obviously, for most people, this would be the appropriate point to close up shop and/or invent some other, more obscure, blog. But frankly, this plays into the worst (or maybe best) thing about my personality.

I am stubborn.

I don’t want to be censored. I don’t want to be muzzled. I don’t want to run scared in the face of distortion and lies. I want the only standard for what I write here to be my own sense of appropriateness and truth.

This is who I am, this is what I have to say: Let my words stand on their own merit.

10 Comments:

Blogger e-kvetcher said...

I'm confused. Do you live in a foreign country? Or has the Inquisition been reconvened?

How can anyone use an anonymous blog on religion as evidence in court?

September 05, 2006 5:07 PM  
Blogger Ben Avuyah said...

DBS, sounds like you are in a terrible predicament, I wish you all the best luck.


I admire your gumption to stick it out, but remember, for most people the blogosphere is just recreation. Don't crucify yourself in the real world for the sake of this one. I'm going to say something that is going to make me sound like a seven year old girl crying for her mommy, compared to the backbone you just showed, but Remember court systems haven't been about what's fair or right for a very long time...if ever. I don't know your situation but I can only imagine one or two scenarios in which a blog might be useful "evidence", and it might not be a bad idea to familiarize yourself with the game and start playing by their rules.

Sad but true.

September 05, 2006 7:22 PM  
Blogger Chana said...

Oh my god, DBS, that sounds awful. I've missed you and your thought-provoking comments/ posts. I hope that it turns out for the best.

I can't think what it is you've said that could ever have hurt or offended anyone. Your posts have always been an inspiration and life-affirming. Of course, I may be missing something...but I don't know what.

We stand with you! As your friends and allies.

September 06, 2006 12:11 AM  
Blogger dbs said...

ek,

Sorry, I can't shed any more light on it right now. But this is still America, not to worry.

Ben,

Of course, what you are saying makes plenty of sense, and it is exactly what I would tell a friend. I do (unfortunatly) know the process well, and will try not sabotage myself.

Chana,

Thanks for the words. I certainly hope that my posts are read in a positive light, but one never knows.

September 06, 2006 11:01 AM  
Blogger Big-S Skeptic said...

I've always liked your blog. It's compassionate and thoughtful, and it bears the mark of an author who is compassionate and thoughtful. I'm sure that whoever reads your posts will see that this is the case, and I'm glad that you've decided to keep it going. I'm very sorry to hear that you are having personal struggles, and I hope the outcome is positive for you. Best of luck.

September 07, 2006 9:44 AM  
Blogger XGH said...

> How can anyone use an anonymous blog on religion as evidence in court?

Child custody case? Anyways, we wish you the best. I hope this comment doesn't get you into any more trouble!

September 10, 2006 11:08 AM  
Blogger Larry Lennhoff said...

I'm shocked that something like this could be used against you. If you need character witnesses for your internet persona, keep me in mind.

September 11, 2006 5:17 PM  
Blogger rebelmo said...

wow, thanks for sharing this, many of us out there are living this false reality, without your balls...

September 13, 2006 9:40 PM  
Blogger dbs said...

Much thanks to all for the kind words.

September 14, 2006 12:09 AM  
Blogger Just me said...

DBS: Sorry for being behind in my reading. You are a man of great courage and convinction. Best of luck to you.

September 20, 2006 12:42 PM  

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